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Marriage to a Russian woman

By: Oksana Boichenko
You will read a lot about Russian hospitality and devotion Russian women have for their families. While the reason such qualities are instilled in most Russian ladies have roots in the history of Russian society, but expression of these qualities will undoubtedly result in having a cozy and comfortable home, to which you will enjoy returning every day and your friends will love spending time at.

Having a cozy and inviting domestic atmosphere is very important to any Russian woman, it is a matter of honor to any housewife. A home is more than just a place you stay at outside of work, it is an extension of the hostess herself and is a symbol of a happy family life, which manifests her caring and giving attitude towards her family.

As you can read in many articles, most Russian women do all of cleaning and cooking themselves. Even though most women work full-time, they usually find time to stop by the store to get food after work, pick up kids, come home and fix dinner, do dishes, as well as other things around the house. Having servants help around the house is very uncommon. Since there are many single mothers, you will also find many women doing some simple manual repairs (in some cases, even in the families, where there are husbands!): nailing a painting to the wall, paint brushing a few things around the house, putting up wall paper, etc.

If you are invited to a Russian woman's home, you can be certain that it will be immaculate when you arrive (no matter how modest). For most Russian women, cleaning the home for guest's arrival is almost a ritual, in which an entire family will be involved. I am willing to bet money, if you tell any Russian woman that she has unexpected guests in fifteen minutes, you will get a shower of expressive screams that it is simple impossible and can't be happening, after which she will delegate a dozen of tasks to the other members of the family, yet perform several times more herself - with a shocking speed. But when the guests arrive, they will be greeted only with warm happy smiles and welcomed the best way possible.

As a guest in a Russian woman's home you can be certain that you will be fed till you cannot breathe and that the hosts will offer you the best of what they have. If you are invited to celebrate a holiday or an event (i.e. birthday), be prepared to have an elaborate several courses meal, preceded by numerous appetizers and followed by many desserts. All of this will certainly be accompanied by long sincere talks, discussion of latest news, etc.

Home cooking is an essential part of Russian culture. Going out to eat is not a casual manner, going to a restaurant is an entire occasion - with getting dressed up, careful planning, etc. Now, fast food places are becoming more affordable and popular with people (at least, in the larger cities), but it is still not nearly as common as eating at home. Aside from the cost, this option has its significant advantages in taste. Russians use little half-ready products, canned items, frozen products, most food is cooked from scratch.
Majority of Russian women grow up knowing how to cook (even though some don't enjoy it all that much). Many recipes are created because of shortage of food products, which was common at one time, and will involve many different ingredients. Many women add their own touch to the recipes - up to their liking…or depending on what she has in the fridge! If she doesn't have carrots for the salad, she will replace it with apples, creating her own recipe. You can often hear about Russian women that they can cook something delicious out of nothing - meaning that a woman might not have been planning to cook something, but using whatever is available in the fridge, she will make up something really yummy.

Russian shopping habits are very simple - buy a product once it is over; instead of shopping once a week to store up on things, people buy things as they are required. Many women still shop at the food markets instead of a supermarket: selection is usually a lot bigger, and products are (most likely) fresher. I am certain, most Russian women will tell you that it is much better to buy milk products and eggs from the market, because you can be sure that they are fresh and they are of domestic make, instead of the industrial make.

Many Russian families will also have some land (called "dacha", which means a Russian summer home), where they normally grow vegetables, greens, fruits (depending on the space available) instead of using it as a vacation area. Unless a family lives in a rural area or owns a house instead of an apartment, "dacha" will normally be some distance from the city, to which one can get by bus or car. Russian women are usually the one directing everyone's efforts here as well - they are the ones who will make plans when, where, and how to plant all vegetables. In spring time, you can see many apartments with boxes on the windows, where there will be small sprouts of plants to be grown (tomatoes, peppers, etc). Since the area in the countryside is usually not very easy to get to, most families tend to it during the weekends; so aside from two full time jobs (a regular job and taking care of the house), many Russian women will spend their weekends working at their "dachas" as hard as men in digging, picking weeds, etc, yet on Monday they will still come to work with manicure, looking their best.

Growing the food is closely connected with finding ways to save it for the colder seasons. While this has become far less prominent in the last few years within modern families, you will still find many homes, where women will prepare and conserve various vegetables and fruits for winter (jams, compotes, marinated tomatoes and cucumbers, etc). These jarred delicious treasures are kept for winter. It is also a rather common practice to prepare home-made wine from fruits (domestic or homemade).

Despite such a number (and difficulty) of the activities that Russian women perform in their life, they accept them as something normal and given. Most Russian women will most likely tell you they are not doing anything extraordinary, as they are used to handling the difficulties, Russian women are survivors. Such a way of thinking makes Russian women very strong morally and psychologically, as well as extremely enduring and patient.